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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51024 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Fri, 06 January 2012 21:47

awjs
Messages: 524
Registered: May 2011
Location: U.S.A.

I got to say that I am really starting to like this story.
Love how the parents actually got the police to stop the H1! mob instead of going off to fight themselves. And that camera idea was brilliant!

‘luck in good finds’ -from Test Tube Babies

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51070 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Sat, 07 January 2012 20:09

Angarato
Messages: 86
Registered: October 2011
Location: Netherlands

I'm also liking this story. I have to say though, that you write pretty fast Very Happy

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51381 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Wed, 11 January 2012 12:30

beyogi
Messages: 942
Registered: May 2011
Location: Germany

I like the new chapter...

I wonder what is the cause for her rapid change. Either she has something like regen 6 or 7 or she's the host of the spirit of cuteness.

Really strange, thank you for writing this interesting and captivating story.

Never think to have thought, since the thinking of thoughts is thoughtless thinking.
You think!

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51448 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Thu, 12 January 2012 00:09

GuesssWho
Messages: 246
Registered: December 2011

So . . . why is hir blood imploding?

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51460 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Thu, 12 January 2012 06:13

Angarato
Messages: 86
Registered: October 2011
Location: Netherlands

Would've been funny if her/his blood was pink too Razz

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51480 is a reply to message #51448 ]

Thu, 12 January 2012 14:00

Cockle
Messages: 646
Registered: July 2011
Location: UK

GuesssWho wrote on Thu, 12 January 2012 05:09

So . . . why is hir blood imploding?

Maybe it's teleporting back to his/her body.

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51483 is a reply to message #51480 ]

Thu, 12 January 2012 15:23

Great Sage
Messages: 10
Registered: January 2012
Location: Edinburgh

If you recall, Tennyo's blood also acts oddly, so maybe there is a connection? maybe she is another Animé/Manga goddess avatar?

The Nature of Monkey is Irrepressible!

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51485 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Thu, 12 January 2012 15:35

kd7mvs
Messages: 668
Registered: March 2009
Location: Tacoma, WA

Tennyo's blood contains antimatter, and goes away. Nikki now has protective magics which cause her samples to vanish as well. Whether either of these relates to this situation, well, we really don't have enough information to speculate effectively.

Nikki Reilly: Sidhe who must be obeyed!
Goodkind International, The Good Ideas People™
Information wants to be free, and I will be the one who frees it! - Psike

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51490 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Thu, 12 January 2012 16:26

Laudator
Messages: 941
Registered: February 2009

And there's another fanfic character whose name I don't recall whose blood(and presumably detached body parts) animates and fights to return to the main body.

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51498 is a reply to message #51490 ]

Thu, 12 January 2012 17:31

kd7mvs
Messages: 668
Registered: March 2009
Location: Tacoma, WA

Laudator wrote on Thu, 12 January 2012 13:26

And there's another fanfic character whose name I don't recall whose blood(and presumably detached body parts) animates and fights to return to the main body.

Right, I remember that one, back from when I was reading a lot more fanfic than I am now. Danged if I can remember the name, but it was well written.

Nikki Reilly: Sidhe who must be obeyed!
Goodkind International, The Good Ideas People™
Information wants to be free, and I will be the one who frees it! - Psike

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51520 is a reply to message #51498 ]

Fri, 13 January 2012 01:45

Abbacor
Messages: 185
Registered: April 2008
Location: Texas

kd7mvs wrote on Thu, 12 January 2012 16:31

Laudator wrote on Thu, 12 January 2012 13:26

And there's another fanfic character whose name I don't recall whose blood(and presumably detached body parts) animates and fights to return to the main body.

Right, I remember that one, back from when I was reading a lot more fanfic than I am now. Danged if I can remember the name, but it was well written.

The story was by Polk Kitsune, called Shade: Reforming. The character in question was named Kyle at the time it first happened.

http://crystalhall.org/chboards3/index.php?t=msg&goto=27 811&S=3d2be5337d1e588450561eab06dd5549#msg_27811

Misty : “It’s not going to be like this every day, is it?”
“Lord, no,” Jadis replied. “Sometimes, it gets weird.”

Hank Declan shook his head, disbelieving. "Tell me I did not just see them roshambo for victory."

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51549 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Fri, 13 January 2012 15:19

Ninsaneja
Messages: 60
Registered: April 2009
Location: Cradle 13

I'm not trying to mean, but this story is still super-generic...

Also, fainting every second is unrealistic unless his/her new powers include anemia or something.

Soon after, the blood of the innocents would rain down from the Cradles, all at the hands of a single Links. One who will be the greatest monster mankind has ever seen, taking more lives than any other in history.

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51588 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Fri, 13 January 2012 23:48

dpragan
Messages: 3168
Registered: December 2008
Location: Texas

Dr. Paine huh? so it is near the family of Josh Wink

~Despite what they say, reality is in the eyes of the beholder, and therefore up for grabs!

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51589 is a reply to message #51549 ]

Fri, 13 January 2012 23:55

dpragan
Messages: 3168
Registered: December 2008
Location: Texas

Ninsaneja wrote on Fri, 13 January 2012 14:19

I'm not trying to mean, but this story is still super-generic...

Also, fainting every second is unrealistic unless his/her new powers include anemia or something.

More like his brain couldn't process how fast the change was going.

We are talking from Male to Female with a period in less then 24 hours. Such changes not only include the flesh, but the hormonal balance which has to be SERIOUSLY out of whack! Also the brain is changing from a male one to a female brain, and yes there is a physical difference.

Basically he was having multiple PSOD's to to Physical/Hormonal/Biological/Emotional shocks hitting the system all at once and in succession.

~Despite what they say, reality is in the eyes of the beholder, and therefore up for grabs!

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Re: Pink? Why Pink? [message #51591 is a reply to message #50401 ]

Sat, 14 January 2012 00:30

Ninsaneja
Messages: 60
Registered: April 2009
Location: Cradle 13

I had a massive rant here, but then I decided to be slightly more polite.

To put it in short, fainting spells are more often medical than mental. The way in which it is presented is hard to believe. Furthermore, it makes your main character less sympathetic, so as a writing tool it's sub-par. I think that ending segments in a different way would be more engaging for the reader. It certainly doesn't seem that you're playing it for laughs, so it feels out of place.

^This has been constructive criticism.

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