| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #57515 is a reply to message #57262 ] |
Sun, 29 April 2012 20:49   |
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 Zimrilim
Messages: 26
Registered: September 2011
Location: Rotterdam |
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"You're in for a puckload of hurt."
"I bet you my stick is better than yours."
Sorry, can't think of any better oneliners. I quite like the story so far however. Especially the Emperor Norton-esque origin story for Buccaneer. And it seems fitting to have a (mostly) harmless oddball as the origin for a superhero.
Also my first thought for the falsies was a sort of uniformity thing as well as a Scramble suit type thing. Especially with the talk about the cartels going after families.
I think my only real gripe with the story is now is that I have barely any idea what everyone looks like. Aside from being short and skin color. Now this may be intentional and certainly isn't a very large complaint.
Can't wait for more.
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #57517 is a reply to message #57262 ] |
Sun, 29 April 2012 22:27 |
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Tsureai
Messages: 126
Registered: July 2008
Location: Texas Y'all! |
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I should have seen the obvious value of Puck puns.
The best I could come up with was.
"High Kicking!" Thwack! "That's a Match Penalty for YOU!"
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #57541 is a reply to message #57262 ] |
Mon, 30 April 2012 09:27 |
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mittfh
Messages: 780
Registered: May 2011
Location: Kenilworth, UK |
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Ho hum - I spotted the obligatory variation-on-a-theme of that infernal Skyrim meme... 
| Quote: | JB used to be great, until he took a Javelin in the knee.
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As to where to take it next - well, obviously the training. Given there are only two suits, I assume they wouldn't use both for training simultaneously, so perhaps they've got training suits that behave like the proper 'Bolt' suits but look different / aren't armoured etc., so if anyone spied on the training, they wouldn't know that they were training for 'Bolt'.
Since Greg is from out-of-area, perhaps at some point show him some recorded footage of Bolt in action, so he can see both what kind of action Bolt gets up to, but (equally importantly) the mannerisms / characterisations associated with the character.
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #57606 is a reply to message #57262 ] |
Tue, 01 May 2012 19:03 |
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Drunkfu
Messages: 180
Registered: December 2008
Location: Latitude 47° 9′ S, Lon... |
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Loving it, and like Trusting said, I enjoy the small to the point serial nature of the updates. Easy to assimilate and each bit brings some advancement to the story.
Also you deserve pain for the javelin to the knee bit.
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #57701 is a reply to message #57606 ] |
Fri, 04 May 2012 11:03 |
Isodecan
Messages: 857
Registered: May 2011
Location: Fort Worth, TX |
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When is the Tampa Twins set? From some of the comments in story, it sounds like after the housing and financial crisis of 2008 (in our universe).
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #57844 is a reply to message #57262 ] |
Sun, 06 May 2012 23:38 |
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Tsureai
Messages: 126
Registered: July 2008
Location: Texas Y'all! |
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never really decided on a particular date. Definitely current era at least.
And much thanks to Pinball for the Ricardo Montalban and "Who Wants the Antidote" inspirations.
You're twisted Pinball! I love it!
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #57850 is a reply to message #57844 ] |
Mon, 07 May 2012 03:30 |
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pbkitty
Messages: 17
Registered: July 2011 |
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| Tsureai wrote on Sun, 06 May 2012 23:38 | You're twisted Pinball! I love it!
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Aw, you'll make me blush^_^
Anyway, you already know what I think about the latest update- Can't wait to see what happens next!
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #57851 is a reply to message #57262 ] |
Mon, 07 May 2012 03:52 |
khade
Messages: 1639
Registered: May 2011
Location: Rockies |
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So that's why the boobs.
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #57893 is a reply to message #57262 ] |
Mon, 07 May 2012 21:30 |
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Tsureai
Messages: 126
Registered: July 2008
Location: Texas Y'all! |
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After your comment about the hard suit I went back and watched me some Bubble Gum crisis. I quickly realized that the hard suits were incredibly realistic mecha designs, (Go Kenichi Sonoda! ) but had the flaw of being entirely custom.
You can't have a low profile hard suit for mass market. Just isn't happening. So than I kind wandered over into Rifts territory, and the Rifts Japan book. There was an armor there called the power spy, which was a soft suit over an exo skeleton.
So it seemed to me that the best way to go with a high agility mass market suit was something that could be fitted, something that could be adjusted with a household tools. The hard parts like the chest and spine are there to provide protection and more importantly something for the suit muscles to leverage against.
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #58332 is a reply to message #57262 ] |
Wed, 16 May 2012 03:56 |
Niknokitueu
Messages: 668
Registered: May 2011
Location: Swansea, UK |
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The sign of a great writer:
| Quote: | "And for Christ's sake, get your tits on straight. That's just embarrassing."
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Like the story. Interesting premise, well executed.
More, please.
Have Fun!
Niknokitueu
Do, or Do Not. There is no Try.
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| Re: The Tampa Twins [message #58407 is a reply to message #57262 ] |
Wed, 16 May 2012 20:13 |
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Zimrilim
Messages: 26
Registered: September 2011
Location: Rotterdam |
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Actually I think there is a lot there that does more than hint at great writing. She captured the cheesy infomercial feel quite well... And of course the subtle Gizmatic naming sense for things.
The only thing I might have liked to see was a mention of how it probably had some computer aided maneuvering. So you can focus more on the fighting and less on the tricky parts of balance. But then again the length was about right already.
And you have me stumped on the JFK reference. The closest I can get is essays written about the conspiracy stored on gopher servers. It's driving me slightly more insane. I can't find it.
But I love the latest chapter though, his self deprecating comments about how he moved turned out very well. I was quite surprised there was no anonymization factor to the suits. At least not specifically mentioned. But the other ones make sense. And provide some nice tie-in with the nearly skin-tight Montalbo in black.
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